With Apologies to Peyton Manning.
We’ve both been told that American football is both engaging and (this was stressed multiple times) totally not gay. I have a very difficult time seeing either of those points.
“It’s about the strategy!” stated one football advocate as his mouth frothed with rage at the very thought of a man who does not watch football. As a counterpoint I offered, “Then why aren’t you so passionate about chess?” This sent the football advocate into a maddened (get it?) frenzy. Apparently football fans don’t appreciate the notion of strategy being found anywhere besides the muscular arms of a burly uber man whose rippling mass denotes the overwhelming masculinity of the sport. There seems to be more focus on the physicality, with the strategy playing an almost peripheral role. In fact, the whole defense of football as more than a Greco-Roman throwdown smacks of the same logic applied to the defense of movies like Kill Bill — sure, there’s an arguably good story, but that’s not what made Kill Bill a top-grossing film. Very few people watched it for the depth of the characters, no matter what anyone says. When you want a story, you buy a story. That’s the reason why Citizen Kane is regarded as a classic while its sequel, Orson Welles Stabs Everyone in the Face is not.
But I digress. If there are fascinating tactics to be found in the realm of spandex-clad guys grunting and tackling each other, then who are we to argue? I guess some guys are just really into strategy.
- Chris
May 20th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Lawl at the “03?”
May 20th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Wow, Mick recovered quick.
May 20th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
We discussed that and we should see lasting injuries in the near future from our random events, but for this one time we took a pass because he just kept looking like a mummy or a dude with a bandaid, I couldn’t find an in between. So let’s say the gold paint, while bursting into flames, also acted to protect him from said flames. Does that work for ya?
May 20th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
This was by far my favorite.
I hate football so much.
Way to capture such a vital truth about society.
May 21st, 2008 at 8:34 am
Please you have to talk about car racing if you go after football. There are more good lines about that as a “sport” then anything else.
May 21st, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Love the comic guys. And anyone who makes fun of Peyton Manning is immediatly upgraded into the category of my best best friends ever!
Question though.. what is in Peytons dads arm?
May 21st, 2008 at 2:09 pm
A football helmet
May 22nd, 2008 at 12:47 am
next time you show a car, can you show calvin’s ridiculously european looking car that his aunt drives? you know what i mean chris
May 22nd, 2008 at 2:38 am
I can’t believe Chris would knock OWSEitF. It’s a cult classic!
May 22nd, 2008 at 10:27 am
doc - I don’t know if we even have to make a joke, three hours of turning left seems funny enough as is
Jurei - suggestion noted!
May 22nd, 2008 at 11:02 pm
P.R.: What on earth is OWSEitF? I’m pretty sure that’s not a real thing. Let me guess: you were playing Scrabble and tried, desperately, to create a word from those letters. You then tried to verify the word’s existence by posting on here under a surname, so that when you were challenged you could say “It’s totally a real thing! Just check out the comment page on Ominousknife.com!” I must say that while I appreciate the plug, I just cannot tolerate your abuse of the English language.
Oh, right. Orson Welles Stabs Everyone in the Face. Gotcha.
May 23rd, 2008 at 8:07 pm
Speaking of abusing the English language… I think you meant he may have been posting here under a pseudonym rather than a surname.
Great strip, guys!
May 24th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
thanks!
May 24th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
You make a good point, but instead of admitting a mistake on my part I choose to do what any good writer would: change reality to fit my words.
That’s right, Chris Shaw’s last name is now officially “P.R.”
June 8th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
Wait, you two are creating a web-comic and you don’t like football?!?