Ominous Questions for June 27, 2008
June 27th, 2008We’re back in the saddle for an all-new Ominous Questions! Here is the rest of the Sean Collins letter, redacted slightly for audience approval:
What I meant to say was that I think Mick goes under used, and should have his own panel. And that’s another thing, I know that Mick isn’t real. I read your ominous questions section the other day and saw that you had the characters responding to people’s well written emails. Seriously?
Walt: Yes, seriously. I’m here, aren’t I?
Was it ominous questions for the characters or for you guys? Why not give the characters their own email addys then? Are google accounts too expensive for you?
Calvin: Those sure are a lot of angry-sounding questions. Let’s tackle the first one: you see us here answering your questions, don’t you?
Walt: That’s what I said!
Calvin: Yeah, they’re questions for us, and we answer them. I’m not sure how much simpler this could be. And if by “you guys” you meant Chris and Kevin, then no. They only tell you all about our adventures, because we’re too busy enjoying life to do it ourselves.
Victor: We’re out there mixing it up with the locals, solving crimes and taking all sorts of risks.
Warren: I spend my whole day shifting paradigms.
Mick: …Okay. Now let’s look at the next questions: we have email addresses, but we don’t use our them because we don’t want spam. I mean sure, there are at least a dozen Nigerian princes who need us to get their money out of the country–
Calvin: For the last time, it was a scam! They weren’t really Nigerian princes!
Mick: Then how’d they learn to write with such distinction? Babelfish? I once typed an Olde English phrase into that thing and translated it to English, and it came out backwards.
Calvin: Yeah, those online translation things are really iffy. You kinda have to know what you want a phrase to read like before you even translate a it.
Victor: Um…I think you guys are getting away from the point. We use our friends’ email addresses because we don’t feel comfortable giving ours to strangers who might spam us. Even if they are Nigerian princes…
Calvin: IT WAS A SCAM!
Walt: I’ll just go ahead and put up the next part of the letter before I punch those three:
It just seems to me that if someone takes the time to write a hilarious email about ideas for your comic, the least you could do is dignify the person with a response. That, and endorse miniville. Seriously I-I don’t know what that is. Is that a town or province of some sort?
Calvin: See, I don’t even know what’s going on in this part. Are you talking to someone in the room with you, Sean? I’m not sure if you know this, but we can’t see you through email.
Walt: What the heck is a miniville?
Still wikipediaing. Did you know that the bomb in Hiroshima killed over 140,000 people?
Warren: Yes I did know that. Paradigm Power Inc. was originally called The Manhattan Project, because our goal was to buy Manhattan. Imagine my surprise when I looked up that name!
You know what else kills?
Warren: What?
Carbon monoxide.
Warren: That’s not funny. Was that supposed to be a joke or something?
Come on back next Friday for more skirmishes with the clinically insane!
June 27th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
i feel so… awkward having read that…
June 28th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Carbon Monoxide is lethal because it bonds to the Heme group in the red blood cells much like oxygen and carbon monoxide, but CO has steric properties that cause it, once bonded to the red blood cell, to be permenantly bonded. This means that that particular cell can no longer bond to oxygen or CO2, but still takes up space in the veins.
Symptoms of CO poisoning, lethargy, dizzyness, and neurological effects are all explained by the drop in usable oxygen delivered to the brain and body parts. Even breathing small amounts of CO over a period of time will build into serious medical problems, culminating in death.
Should exposure occur, a few weeks are required before the patient will recover completely, but should be able to operate normally if uncomfortably. Recovery is a function of the normal turnover that occurs in the body. That is to say, the cells normally die and are replaced every few weeks. Large exposures required medical attention, possibly consisting of assisted breathing and blood transfusion.
Carbon Monoxide has been linked to some cancers and other physiological effects but the term Carbon Monoxide Poisoning as a cause of death pretains to the neuron death in the brain due to a lack of oxygen.
June 30th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Apparently Miniville is a comic, but I don’t know much else.