I am actually struck speechless by this, which is good because if I mention the number of times I’ve had to drive people to court this comic would become a lot shorter. But no matter who you are, you have to admit: dodgeball violence is hilarious. There is nothing about dodgeball that isn’t funny, and this is coming from a guy who dislocated a shoulder playing the game. Granted, I was throwing the ball and not being hit by it, but my point still stands. One time when I was a camp counselor I hit a kid so hard his legs flew out behind him and he slid across the floor on his stomach. By Jove, that was a great first day.

Now we have less intense games of dodgeball, mainly because the kids throw harder and we’re getting older. Usually as I shamble my girth across the ten or so yards it takes to not get pelted to death I recall my halcyon days as the dispenser of pain, and try to retain whatever dignity doesn’t get crushed out of my weeping body. I guess what goes around comes around, in which case I advise Kevin to stay away from dodgeballs lest he be struck temporarily blind and deaf in one ear. Yeah, you thought the concussion made me forget, didn’t you? I’m gonna sauce up your meatball next time I see you!

Tags: concussions, dodgeball, Jove, Kevin can't play dodgeball, violence

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